The episode begins with Candice and Laurie reminiscing about their dearly departed Blake. Were it anyone else I would say here, “Ah [insert name here], we hardly knew ye,” but in this case, I think we knew ye all too well. Ta-ta for now, sweet prince.
On the kitchen counter someone has placed a rather conspicuous boom box. The contestants speculate on what this could possibly mean for the challenge and absolutely no one guesses correctly. But we do get to see Laurie rocking her ‘fro, boom box on her shoulder, dryly quoting everyone’s favorite summer jam from 1993, “Whoomp! (There It Is).” Modern art.
The designers leave the comfort of their apartments and meet Tim in what looks to be an outdoor ghost town of nostalgia, filled with obsolete electronics. The lovely editor-in-chief of Marie Claire, Anne Fulenwider, joins Tim to introduce this week’s unconventional challenge.
The Challenge:
Dumpster dive into a huge pile of tech garbage. In one day, use the outdated technology to create a modern and fashionable look. The designers fill shopping carts with 30 years’ worth of circuit boards, VHS tapes, cords, vinyl records, etc…, and push the carts all the way back to the workroom. They should be happy to spend some time out in the real world, even if they do look like a futuristic dystopian wagon trail.
In the workroom everyone gets straight to work hammering and manipulating their materials, but Jake asks to speak privately with Tim. Jake reveals that he has been made aware that his dog needs to be put down. Jake and Tim share an emotional moment and then Jake decides to remove himself from the competition. There are always conspiracy theorists and some may speculate about Jake’s departure, but all I see is someone genuinely mourning the loss of a loved one.
Okay, sincere moment over. The show must go on! Ashley is an early standout in the workroom. She’s used a rolling pin over some Polaroid film to create an entirely original pattern with the burst of chemicals. If she can find enough pictures, she’ll have fabric for an entire dress. If not, the whole process may have been for naught.
Lindsey tells Tim she’s having trouble getting started because her brain doesn’t work unconventionally. This is why these challenges are so crucial. They prove which contestants are actually brilliant and which contestants are hiding behind beautiful fabric.
Kelly’s aluminum look impresses Tim and even though she doesn’t know what a paillette is, her sexy suit of armor is delivering.
Merline is going big (bird) because she has immunity and if not now, when? Joe is trying to sex it up, but is totally missing the whole “be creative” part of the challenge. Swapnil is creating a sculptural top but considers (aloud, to Tim!) using muslin for the skirt. What is he, new? Did I dream the last six challenges? Actually, that would explain a lot.
Swapnil goes deeper into his strategy while snacking with Candice, explaining that he only wants to be safe until he gets further into the competition. And while this could very well be an excuse for never having been in the top, he does seem to be holding back. He takes a lot of smoke breaks, goofs around, and is not fully living up to his potential. Swapnil, if you’re reading this: I’m not mad, just disappointed.
Unbelievably, Joseph is done before anyone else. His look is simple, but he worries that if he adds more, it will be like “decorating a Christmas tree.” Kelly is pretty close to done when her model tries on the dress and the two of them realize she’s rocking some pretty dangerous side boob. Kelly improvises by adding two side panels and the look is kicked up a notch further. Ms. Roboto is so chic.
Swapnil has wasted so much time that even though he and Tim agreed muslin was a one-way ticket to elimination town, he has no choice but to make an itsy-bitsy skirt of muslin anyway. He paints a quick pattern on the skirt in grey, but honestly, he might as well just paint the word “regret” on it. Whatevs, smoke break!
Meanwhile, in the last few minutes Edmond realizes he has a bit of time and material left over, so he whips up a clutch. Uh, Joseph? Swapnil? Are you two seeing this? This is how you make good use of your time on “Project Runway.” Use every last tick of that clock to prove you deserve to be there.
Runway:
Heidi loves her pantsuits. Today it’s a black shiny pant and blazer with a real showstopper of a tribal-inspired necklace that’s probably worth more than my apartment building. It’s cool and pretty and I’m not crying, you’re crying!
She mentions casually that there are nine contestants left “and after today there will be eight.” Jake’s departure will not mean guaranteed safety for the remaining contestants and I say GOOD! No easy breaks here!
This week Zac, Nina and Heidi are joined on the judging panel by actress and sugary sweetheart Paula Patton, as well as Anne Fulenwider. You may remember Anne from earlier in this episode when she gifted the designers with a pile of trash and said, “Make me something pretty.” That is not a direct quote. Tim clutches his save tightly to his multi-patterned chest, giving the designers hope, but not too much.
The Top:
Edmond: A mid-thigh-length black dress with plunging neckline made of mouse pads, embellished with upside-down keys from a computer keyboard and strong fringe-laden shoulders. The back is made of an intentional tangle of crisscrossed wires. Additionally, Edmond made a blue clutch from a camcorder bag. It’s the kind of dress I can see a badass cyborg wearing.
Ashley: A flirty sleeveless dress made of Polaroids, with a triangle cut from the chest to the bellybutton. I like to think I’m usually more eloquent but my feelings towards this dress are just: It is so cute.
Kelly, the winner: A shiny V-neck miniskirt made of aluminum tubing. It’s bold and fresh and Kelly has clearly been learning what makes something high fashion – and not to mention, what the judges like.
The Bottom:
Joseph: A short black and blue dress made with mouse pads and piped with wire. A strip of wire runs down the center of the dress and ends in a jumbled mess just past the hem. It looks like an electronic dress that used to light up or something but has since shut down forever. Not a great concept for something that should be fun and exciting.
Swapnil: A large sculpted wearable art piece made of white wire on top and a muslin grey miniskirt on the bottom. The top looks purposeful and designed until the eye reaches the model’s midsection. From there down, it looks like Swapnil sort of haphazardly arranged the wires temporarily, then sent his model out on the runway before he remembered to fix it.
Lindsey: It’s a white almost-but-not-quite empire waist dress embellished with keyboard keys on the top and made of thin plastic CD holders on the bottom. She hasn’t transformed any of the elements, and when Zac mentions that it reminds him of a bathroom there’s a collective, “Oh yeah, that’s what I’m seeing,” amongst the judges (and presumably the audience). Zac adds that Lindsey needs a little “Swapnil juice,” meaning she’s got to kick her designs up a notch, but everyone’s mind is in the gutter and it makes for a much needed break in the tension. “Swapnil juice sounds awesome,” Heidi says. Yikes.
In the end, the judges decide that Joseph has produced too many yawn-worthy looks in comparison to his competition and he is sent home.
