Team challenge! It’s a simple concept, but it strikes fear into the hearts of high school students and “Project Runway” designers alike. These collaborative efforts always lead to the most quality cringe-worthy moments of the season. So let’s embrace the discomfort, shall we?
The designers climb aboard a gigantic cruise ship, the Celebrity Summit. There they find Tim suited up and soaking up the sun with the President and CEO of Celebrity Cruises, Lisa Lutoff-Perlo.
The Challenge: Teams of two, decided by the button bag of doom, will choose from one of seven suitcases. Inspired by the destination labeled on their chosen suitcase, they must create a high-end day-to-night look in eight hours. Easy peasy, right?
The teams are decided as follows:
Amanda and Gabrielle choose South of France
Ashley and Candice choose Venice
Lindsey and Jake choose Hong Kong
Laurie and Swapnil choose India
Kelly and Blake choose the Greek Isles
Edmond and Hanmiao choose the Caribbean
Merline and Joe choose St. Petersburg
Some of the pairs seem well matched. Amanda and Gabrielle get right down to business, Kelly and Blake are wacky and energetic, Candice and Ashley clearly speak the same language, and Swapnil and Laurie blend aesthetics harmoniously.
On the flip side, there are some teams that are dead in the designer water before they even begin. Hanmiao expresses concerns that she and Edmond have two very different styles. Lindsey and Jake, designing for the destination of Hong Kong, argue over whether or not it’s appropriate to make a kimono. Joseph seems to be annoyed by Merline’s very existence.
In fact, we need to talk about Merline. Joe is anxious about pairing up with Merline because, as we’ve heard him say before, she’s “a lot to handle.” Yes, she does have the energy of a Girl Scout who has dipped into her own cookie stash, but considering Joe’s yawn-inducing performance so far, he could probably use a bit of her spirit. She’s got as much joy as an entire Southern Baptist church choir and stifling that won’t do anyone any good.
And speaking of stifling, Jake’s treatment of Lindsey is also less than productive. Lindsey sees right through his patronizing words, literally – she’s pulling off the grandma-glasses-on-a-chain aesthetic – but she does little to stop him.
Meanwhile, Edmond is struggling to hear Hanmiao’s voice, mostly because she refuses to speak. He wants to do a flowy skirt and top that will double as a bathing suit to fit their Caribbean destination. Hanmiao wants a structured garment that can be worn on the beach. He offers up compromises but she’s so frustrated by working in a team that she snaps at him.
After consulting with Tim, most of the designers seem to be heading in a pretty good direction. Ashley and Candice are the two best friends working in unison, Swapnil and Laurie switch fabrics for their modern sari, and Hanmiao and Edmond decide to go with Edmond’s original idea. Or do they?
While fitting the model Hanmiao decides she doesn’t like the color. And then the model speaks: “My mother told me never to wear yellow.” Is your mother on “Project Runway?” Does your mother have her reputation as a designer on the line? Unless your mother is Hanmiao or Edmond, please shush.
But for all of Hanmiao’s problems with the challenge this week, she’s the most entertaining. When Edmond exclaims in frustration, “I need a cigarette!” she says, “I need a cigarette, too!” Later she pins her bathing suit to her mannequin whilst sitting on it. And then for the grand finale she grabs her model 10 minutes before the runway and locks herself in the bathroom with her. She then proceeds to sew the model into the garment so that Edmond can’t make any changes. In terms of being a team player, Hanmiao is doing it all wrong, but watching the two of them is like watching a modern screwball comedy.
Runway
Zac, Nina, Heidi and Tim are all present and accounted for, joined by Laurie’s dream guest judge and star of “Black-ish,” Tracee Ellis Ross.
The Top:
Candice and Ashley, the winners: Inspired by Venice, it’s a soft red bell-bottom pant, a black-and-white striped top with a cowl neck back, and a floral cape. It’s cheery and sophisticated and kind of brave. Maybe I should buy a cape.
Lindsey and Jake: Inspired by Hong Kong, it’s some kind of red romper with gold print, a long attached skirt, and a dramatic green vest with a similar gold print. On the runway they argue about the process by which they arrived at this look (a top look, by the way – this is not the time or place for this argument, people!) until Lindsey has the good sense to shut it down.
Laurie and Swapnil: Inspired by India, it’s striped crop-top in deep jewel tones with a high-waisted grey-blue pant, accompanied by a sari-like sash. It’s modern and soft and it feels like something a cultured, badass woman of the world would wear. The judges disagree about the fit of the pant but there’s no denying it’s a beautiful look.
The Bottom:
Edmond and Hanmiao: Inspired by the Caribbean, it’s a two-piece bathing suit made from a bright, tropical non-stretch cotton, a yellow detachable maxi skirt…thing, and some ropey fabric strings in the midriff area. It doesn’t fit, it’s too literal, and it’s next-level bad.
Merline and Joseph: Inspired by St. Petersburg, it’s a light pink sleeveless dress with a shiny pink cape. I’m really rethinking investing in a cape. On the runway, Joseph admits that Tim was worried the outfit would read as matronly, but Joe didn’t have a problem with that because apparently “dowdy” is his aesthetic. He claims that he spent too much time teaching Merline to design to be able to make a finished product. As he (figuratively) picks her up and hurls her under the bus, Merline looks like she wants to disappear. Let this be a life lesson for us all: Never let anyone crush your spirit, especially when you’re on a reality competition television show!
Amanda and Gabrielle: Inspired by the South of France, it’s an asymmetrical white tank with a striped patterned lining and long bell-bottomed navy pants. The top is reminiscent of what Gabrielle was wearing at the introduction of the challenge on the ship. These two seemed to work well together and really thought that they were headed in the right direction, which is almost more worrisome than if they had fought over the design – did they really think this look was working?
Despite all the runway atrocities, Ashley and Candice’s pieces shine through. The judges can’t come to a decision about who should take the win, so they give it to both women. This makes two wins for Ashley – and one episode so far where she didn’t shed a tear. You. Go. Girls.
In the end, Edmond’s immunity comes into play and the judges are forced to give Hanmiao the boot. I’m a little disappointed, not because I was looking forward to her designs but because her antics were bizarre and hilarious. Her parting words (“You have to work as a team. I know that I failed. Communication is the only way, the best way, to fix it”) will echo an eternity…or at least until the next challenge.
