19 Most Ridiculous Lifetime Movie Titles of All Time

Because, Lifetime.

1. From Straight A's to XXX

As Amy Poehler once said, “None of us have plans to do porn.” But, sometimes life demands otherwise.

2. Baby for Sale

So subtle - what could the plot be?

3. Restless Virgins

This could easily be a movie about my performing arts high school.

4. Newlywed and Dead

Hope the wedding was nice, at least.

5. Drink, Slay, Love

"Pearl is a typical sixteen year-old vampire." #EnoughSaid

6. I Me Wed

Swipe right on yourself!

7. The Secret of Hidden Lake

A lake that is not only hidden but also has a secret is my kind of lake.

8. My Father Must Die

Okay, sure, whatever you say.

9. Grumpy Cat's Worst Christmas Ever

Could our forebears, as they struggled to innovate and imagine a better life for us, have predicted this particular collection of words?

10. Deadly Daycare

Imagine the Yelp reviews

11. I Do (But I Don't)

Sounds like someone needs to watch "I Me Wed."

12. Side Order of Life

Hold the strife, am I right?

13. My Little Assassin

The mind races.

14. Baby Monitor: Sound of Fear

...

15. Will You Merry Me

Go home, movie, you're drunk.

16. Stalked By My Doctor

I mean, if only! I can barely get mine to stay in the room for ten minutes!

17. Wait Till Helen Comes

Helen, we take it, is kind of a lot.

18. The Last Prostitute

The very last one.

and finally:

19. Mother, May I Sleep With Danger?

A question no mother wants to be asked, and the most bonkers title of all.